So, of course the words of this post are still ringing in my ear. I've thought through it a lot. (Thanks for the supportive emails and comments, by the way.)
I'm pretty good at forgiving lame things people say to me. Probably because I lay in bed nightly and think of the (fifteen or so) ridiculous and regrettable things I have said to people during the day. I get that sometimes the things that come out of your mouth and your intention can be very different. I'm just as guilty as the next person.
That said, things people say about my adoption (the process, but especially about my son or his birthplace/history) sting a little more than the average zinger. The thing is, our little family is still very new and oftentimes people assume I am more confident or comfortable in my role than I really am. I'm still learning it, figuring it out. And I'm EXTREMELY protective over my son, his history, and how we became a family. I recognize that because of this I am pretty sensitive.
I have heard A LOT of ridiculous comments since starting the process to adopt. The most offensive questions have been about Abel's medical/family/social history. I mean, really, the audacity of people when it comes to this stuff is beyond me. (Would I walk into a newborn nursery and say to you, "Your baby is beautiful. Does his dad have AIDS?")
The thing that struck me today is that while that comment about being "let" to adopt my child stung, it's a lot easier for me to take than the obnoxious comments directed at my son. I can take it. I'm a grown up. I can rationalize and recognize stupidity. My son can't do that and won't be able to for a long time. It kills me to think of these comments hurting him someday.
I am attempting to change my attitude from balking at stupid questions to taking the opportunity to educate about international adoption - the beautiful and the ugly. Any advice on transitioning awkward adoption questions/comments into teachable moments is appreciated!
